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Crap, I got so caught up in New Years Decade, Assassin’s Creed II, Tropico 3 and whatnot that I completely forgot about this Halo Legends episode. Well, on the bright side, streaming it online gives me the chance to get some omgpics! So there’s something to make up for it, right?

Also, believe it or not, I’ve been anticipating this episode in particular. Why? I’ll explain 2 paragraphs below.

IN THE DARK REACHES OF SPACE!

After the events of Halo 3 (wherein (*ahem* Spoiler alert!(?)) the Master Chief and Cortana end up lost in deep space in a half-destroyed warship), Cortana finds herself with nothing better to do than to contemplate her virtual navel (and perhaps the Master Chief’s cryogenetically-frozen navel, as well). She claims that upon her creation, it took her 2 hours to absorb the data pertaining to all of human history, knowledge, and understanding. Well, thanks for being such a cocky cunt, Cortana. Maybe you should take up being a schoolteacher… Actually holy shit that should totally happen. A.I. teachers? No, not that! Cortana in a teacher’s–

I mean … Anyway, so this is when the flashbacks begin. Oh boy, the flashback of all flashbacks. The flashback that retells the entire Halo timeline, from 100,000 BC to 2553 AD. Not that this is a bad thing, as this episode can be compared to The Animatrix’s The Second Renaissance, and everybody knows that was the best short of the Animatrix anthology. But then again, most people watching these should already know the history, so you would think they make up for it in pretty cinematics and finally showing us a glimpse of what really happened back then, of Forerunner civilization, right? Right, so I won’t bother with a synopsis as there isn’t much to say. As I mentioned before, I’ll make it up to you with what everyone loves: Pretty pictures!

Cortana proves she was behind it all by showing us her All-Seeing Eye...

100,000 years ago, the Forerunners ruled the galaxy.
Until a bunch of extragalactic space zombies knocked on their door and, ahem, flooded their worlds and colonies.
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Oh, god dammit, Microsoft, stop changing which Saturdays you’re going to air these episodes on. I nearly missed it again, but it’s clearly their bad this time. As a “plus” (if you could call it that), the entire episode was uploaded, rather than part 2 only, which makes me reviewing this harder. Oh well, time to deliver.

… Pun intended.

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If you’re anything like me, then you love a good amount of action in your anime/manga, with bonus points being awarded not only for how awesome said action is, but how hilarious it can be, as well. No other series comes out on top for me with this than Hokuto no Ken, or Fist of the North Star for the moonspeak impaired. Hokuto no Ken can sometimes only be described as an absolute good, and anyone who tries to tell you otherwise doesn’t know the meaning of good entertainment and you should probably stop talking to this person. (continue reading…)